Adventures in Margaritaville
by Scout1
Summary: Mulder and Scully get bored at work, so they decide to cut out early. They go drinking and end up in quite a predicament. Written by my friend Lele and I. R/R.


-Title: Adventures in Magaritaville  
-Authors: Erin and LeLe  
-Rating: PG-13 (for language and themes)  
-Category: Humor/MSR  
-Disclaimer: The X-Files and characters were created by Chris Carter and   
remain his copyrighted property, the property of 1013 Productions, and the   
property of Fox Television, a unit of 20th Century Fox, Inc. No infringement   
of any copyright is intended. The songs used aren't ours, either. Damn.  
-Summary: Mulder and Scully get bored at work, so they decide to cut out   
early. They go drinking and end up in quite a predicament. R/R.  
-Author's Note: Don't say anything about this being out of character for   
Scully or Skinner or anyone, because we just did this out of pure hilarity   
and silliness. It takes place kind of Pre-Requiem, but in July of this   
year. Don't ask. Please, dear God, don't ask. I wrote this with my good   
friend Erin, who's just as much a Shipper as I. We actually make quite a   
writing team, always writing for humor. We hope you enjoy it.  
  
XxXx Adventures in Magaritaville xXxX  
  
FBI Headquarters  
J. Edgar Hoover Building: X-Files Office  
Washington, DC  
July 3, 2001; 5:06 PM  
  
  
"Hey, Scully," Mulder said. They had been working on a case report all   
day. The work was becoming boring and monotonous, so Mulder thought of   
something they could do. He'd all ready stuck too many pencils in the   
ceiling tiles, eaten a bag of sunflower seeds and had read the Lone   
Gunmen's corny newspaper three times.   
  
"Yeah?," she answered, not looking away from her computer screen.  
  
"Let's cut out early. I'm bored as hell and this case is just too damned   
boring to write about," he complained.  
  
"Yeah, you're right," Scully leaned back in her chair and rubbed her   
eyes, "where to?"  
  
Mulder's eyes twinkled, "You know that new place that just opened on the   
corner of 5th and 32nd?"  
  
"Mattick's Pub Club?"  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
  
Mattick's Pub Club  
5:32 PM  
  
  
Mulder and Scully entered the bar and had immediately ordered two burgers,   
an order of fries and two beers. To their convenience, it was karaoke   
night.   
  
"Hey, Scully, you wanna step up there and sing?," Mulder asked.  
  
"No! I'd be embarrassed!"  
  
8:40 PM  
  
"Yahoo! Come on, Foxy, let's get up there and shake our booties!"  
  
"Thure Thcully!," he had a lisp for some odd reason, most likely because   
he was drunk. The two very drunk agents stepped up on stage, their arms   
around one another's shoulders in affectionate gesture, but holding each   
other up at the same time. They stood in front of the microphone and   
burst into song!  
  
"One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do," Mulder sang loudly.  
  
"Two can be as bad as one, it's the loneliest number since the number one,"   
Scully grabbed the mic and belted it out. They fell silent, not knowing   
the rest of the song.  
  
"Umm...ah...," Mulder got stuck.  
  
"I'm just a bill, yes, I'm only a bill and I'm sitting here on Capitol   
Hill. Well, it's a long, long journey to the...to the...uhh...umm...,"   
Scully sang.  
  
"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves,   
everybody's nerves. I know a song that gets on everybody's...," Mulder   
yelled.  
  
"NERVES!," Scully screamed. The two went into hysterics and fell against   
each other. They tumbled off the stage into a tangle of arms, limbs and   
red hair.  
  
  
7 Beers and 5 Hours Later...  
  
  
Washington DC City Hall  
10:37 PM  
  
  
"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to   
hold, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health?"  
  
"Well, DUH! We wouldn't be here if we didn't wanna get married!," Scully   
exclaimed.  
  
"Then by the power invested in me by City Hall, I pronounce you man and   
wife. You may now kiss --," the man stopped as Mulder and Scully began   
to make out. He handed them a marriage certificate and left them.  
  
"Let's go home, Michelle, ma belle...," Mulder started singing the   
Beatles' song.   
  
"I'm not Michelle. I'm...drunk!," Scully declared.  
  
  
Scully's Apartment  
July 4, 2001; 1:53 AM  
  
  
"That was some good sex," Scully said, stroking the top of Mulder's head.   
She looked over at the small red light that was blinking on her answering   
machine. She reached over, pressed it and listened.   
  
"Agent Scully! Where are you?," Skinner's voice boomed from the machine.  
  
"In Magaritaville!," she shouted gleefully.  
  
"You and Mulder need to hand in that case report! Now!," he went on.   
Scully sighed. Mulder grabbed the machine and threw it across the room   
to make it shut up. The two of them fell into a drunken sleep.  
  
  
7:43 AM  
  
  
Mulder woke up in Scully's apartment with a hang over. He was naked.   
Scully was also naked, sleeping quietly in his arms. He gently shook her.   
She opened her eyes and quickly sat up.  
  
"Shit! Oh, shit!," she yelled, "what the hell did we do?"  
  
"Apparently, we had sex," Mulder said calmly. Scully jumped up and ran   
over to her dresser to put on some clothes. She then saw the marriage   
certificate.  
  
"Damn it, Mulder, do you know what else we did?!"  
  
"No..."  
  
"We...we got married!"  
  
"Shit...," Mulder muttered.  
  
  
Washington DC City Hall  
7:51 AM  
  
  
"I'm sorry, I can't just annul this marriage!"  
  
"We were drunk! Isn't that reason enough?," Scully cried.  
  
"You didn't get married in a church! I can't do it, I'm sorry!"  
  
"How about a divorce?"  
  
"Er...no. Not for rushed weddings. I'm sorry. Have a nice life!," said   
the 'priest.'  
  
"Damn you! Damn you to Hell!," Mulder whispered.  
  
  
Cafe on the Parkway  
8:02 AM  
  
  
Mulder and Scully drank their coffee in silence, both still in shock.  
  
"I can't believe this," Scully muttered.  
  
"I'm sorry," Mulder apologized. He placed his hand on her shoulder.  
  
"We shouldn't have done this...but there's a part of me that wants to   
see if this'll work out," Scully admitted, looking into his gorgeous   
hazel eyes.  
  
"Me, too," Mulder murmured.   
  
"I love you," she whispered.  
  
"I love you, too. I've wanted to tell you for so long!," Mulder told her.   
Their lips met in a passionate kiss.   
  
"But what do we do now?" Scully asked, quietly.  
  
"I dont think that there's anything we can do," Mulder replied.  
  
"Oh my God, look at the time! We were kissing longer than I thought! We're   
late for work!" Scully exclaimed, looking down at her watch. They hurried   
off to the office.  
  
  
FBI Headquarters  
J. Edgar Hoover Building: X-Files Office  
8:33 AM  
  
  
"Where have you two been?!" Skinner cried furiously.  
  
"To tell you the truth...," Mulder started.  
  
"We have no idea where we went before City Hall or where we went between   
there and my apartment. I assume a bar. But...when we were in City Hall,   
we kind of...got married," Scully admitted. She looked down at her toes.  
  
"What?," Skinner asked.  
  
"We got married. But we were drunk as hell, sir, you've gotta keep that   
in mind," Mulder said.  
  
"You know how I feel about in-office relationships!"  
  
"Mulder and I didn't know what we were doing!"  
  
"Just don't blame it on Scully, it was probably all my fault."  
  
"Be quiet, you two. What have you decided to do about this whole marriage   
thing?"  
  
"You're not gonna like it," Mulder gave Scully a look as he said this.  
  
"We've decided to see if it works out. We...we've got feelings for each   
other," Scully told him.   
  
They didn't know that any man could look so furious and confused at the   
same time. Skinner's face turned from red to purple in less than a second.   
Mulder almost laughed at the sight.  
  
"You...you...you have...FEELINGS for each other?!" he raged.  
  
"Err..." Scully said sheepishly.  
  
"Yes, we do. We're very much in love and there's nothing anyone can do   
about it," Mulder announced. He suddenly stood up and swept Scully into   
his arms. He kicked opened Skinner's door and walked out, every movement   
over dramatically made.   
  
"He's going to fire us, you idiot!," Scully exclaimed.  
  
"Is that any way to talk to your husband?," Mulder asked sarcastically.  
  
"You just don't think, do you?," she asked, trying to get down to the   
floor. He smiled at her.   
  
"I was thinking, thank you. I was thinking that we should celebrate this   
glorious event done out of love by going to Mattick's Pub Club..."  
  
XxXx THE END...? xXxX 


End file.
